Choices: My way or His

I feel like this past while I've been craving downtime. Probably selfishly...as I am at the place with my family where life is good. So much to be thankful for. But as I have a desire to sit and watch the world go by, I feel that God is calling me out of the zone and be used by Him. It's not how I would have like to see this summer be. But it's not my life...it's His, right?
Sometimes I just want to BE. Be like everyone around me having fun and getting together. I have that and I feel blessed but God is calling more from me. Well, He is calling more from everybody...but I struggle with pretending not to hear His gentle voice. I've been in a position in my life where I felt like Jonah running from Nineveh...that was horrible. The guilt grew high and I felt, at times I could barely breathe. I knew that God was calling me but I refused to listen. It wasn't something that I planning or had a desire for. The opposite of that feeling? Throwing my hands up in the air and asking God to help me. He did. He always does. Not only did He grant me peace, acceptance but the strength and hoops to jump to make the 'impossible' happen and it really wasn't that bad...in fact, it was down right unbelievable, God poured out blessings and did miracles to make things happen.
I really want to do what God is calling me. Refusal to do that makes me only frustrated and weary. Pretending to avoid His will only makes life more difficult and makes me turn bitter.
So lately, I've had lots on my mind. I'm ready to say yes. My heels are still wading in the mud but I know the alternative....which will bring all sorts of issues/paths/whales.
I have been thinking many things over and over again. I can't pretend and avoid any more. I truly want peace. God knows me and my path He is guiding me on. Though at times I feel like I am blind-folded, I can't imagine a better Guide.
So today, I will try to obey His will for me. Perhaps God is doing this to prepare me for something along the journey, perhaps a teachable moment to share with my kids but I'm following His lead...not on my own strength. And that's peace...